Dami would always ask if Remi and I talked and if we were still friends and I started to wonder why he kept on asking me about her. He didn’t even ask me that much about Veronica and he liked Veronica for getting us together, hmmm strange right? Anyways, Remi had this Congolese friend called Tracey that I think Dami had history with…well sex. Tracey and I had been introduced a couple of times but I didn’t really have an opinion of her and I never knew they had history until Dami and I got together. I remember going to Dami’s house after college and he was in the shower and someone called him, I flipped the phone over and saw that Tracey was calling him. It felt a bit weird but pushed it to the back of my head.

I mean, men and women can be friends but I wondered why he’d still be talking to someone that he had been involved with before me. I also wondered why she would have been calling since she knew the we were together…STRANGE. I had a million and one things running through my mind but I heard him coming out of the shower and quickly put the phone back on the other side of the room with the screen facing downwards.

He came into the room and said ”Oh babes my phone was ringing “

Me – “Yeah, I heard it, I think its over there on your table”

He turned the phone over and looked at me trying to sus whether or not I’ve looked at the screen. Guess what this dickhead says, Dami, my boyfriend then proceeds to say “Oh it was my brother”. I froze, how on earth did my boyfriend just lie to my face, unprovoked, and how on earth do I let him know that I looked at his phone. *sigh*

I took it on the chin, kept quiet and decided to try harder, I wasn’t someone who liked confrontation and people used to just walk all over me. Not anymore though lol. But looking back, maybe I wasn’t as affectionate as he needed me to be. Maybe it was because I was still a virgin?

Months went by and we were speaking less often, the spark was going. Dami often reassured me that he wanted to marry me and how he wanted me to be the mother of his children. Girllllll how deluded was I ?

I will never forget the day when we had spoke on the phone for hours and he said he loved me. Only for him to call me back 2 mins later 

Dami – “Hello” 

Me – “Hey”

Dami – “Wait, Tracey is that you?”

Me – I paused….”No Tayo”

Dami – “Oh damn, you okay?”

I hung up the phone immediately. LOL this guy obviously thinks I’m an idiot, why would a guy in a relationship be calling his ex fuck buddy at 4am?. Abeg the stress was becoming too much. He called me for days and I never answered, we just seemed to be having so many problems. We used to get on so well, I wondered what changed? I wonder why he wanted to call her ?

At this point I was already emotionally detached because I knew something wasn’t right and I felt it in my gut. I knew I deserved better, I had guys INCLUDING his friends who wanted me, and like a dummy I stayed loyal. For what ?

Anyways, he called me and explained that nothing was going on and guess who took him back like a clown… Yep you guessed it, ME.

February was here and I was so excited because it was going to be my FIRST valentines and I had all of my appointments booked. Nails, hair everything, I wanted to make sure I looked good for my man. So valentines day was booked but it was on a weekday , something came up and I couldn’t make it. It was fine though, we rescheduled for that weekend.

I remember this day like it was yesterday, It was a Thursday and I was at my aunty’s house in Hackney. Dami called me and I was so excited, I was going to see him in 2 days. 

Dami – “Hello Tee”

Me – “Hey babes you okay, can’t wait to see you this weekend”

Dami sounded strange, he was nervous

Me – “What’s wrong, is everything okay?”

Dami – “I need to tell you something, where are you” 

Me- “I’m at my aunts house, what’s wrong”

Dami – *sighs*- “T-Tracey”

At this point I was confused 

Me – “What about Tracey?”

Dami – “Tracey is pregnant and said she might have Chlamydia, you need to go to the clinic”

I choked, I was talking but the words were not coming out 

Me – “I don’t understand, what do you mean”

Dami – “It was when we slept with each other, it was way before we got together, months ago”

My heart sunk and I fought to hold back my tears 

Dami – “Hello, T plea..”

I was silent and hung up the phone because deep down inside I knew he was lying. I couldn’t breathe.

I cried for days, thinking about all the promises he made , everything we shared and how everything including my VIRGINITY was gone just like that 

I guess REMI won

Dami called my phone everyday, multiple times in day and I never answered one phone call. He sent me texts and called me with random numbers but I knew it was him and ended up switching off my phone. Veronica would come to my house and we would stay in my room in the dark in bed just crying with eachother, she broke up with her boyfriend a week before Dami called me to tell me the news. Well, that was it, another Yoruba man who promised me the world breaking my heart. I felt like sh**. Not only did I lose my relationship, but I also lost my best friend. 

My mum noticed I was losing weight, wasn’t eating and wasn’t coming out of my room. She asked for Veronica’s number so many times to see if she would talk, but Veronica would just tell my mum that she didn’t know what was wrong with me and that she would speak to me.

Now I needed to find a clinic to get tested…

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